Guided By the Lighthouse

When Steven was in his final days of treatment at Cedar House, he took time to write about his experience and share his story with his group. This is his heartfelt reflection in his own words:

My name is Steven, and I am a recovering drug addict. Throughout my life I have used a variety of drugs from marijuana, cocaine, meth, and heroin to fentanyl. There would be times when I would hear people share and say that they are just like me. But I am not going to do that today, because I have no idea of what your stories are. What I would like to do is share a little bit of my story and what I have been through, and maybe you can relate to it.

In my story, I took a path with so much pain and adversity. I would hide the pain from everyone. At a very young age, I was molested. This started my journey of PTSD and drug addiction. I would hide and isolate from people because I was terribly afraid of what people would think of me. I felt ashamed for what had happened to me. So, when my sister offered me drugs at a young age, I did them with her, and I felt a sense of relief. It would numb the pain and embarrassment that I felt from what had happened. My self-pity drove me into doing more and more drugs. I would blame myself for what that person did to me. I was so angry that I had no control over what had happened. I was just a child. I bottled up my feelings and buried them deep down inside. It would eat at me every day -- day in and day out. Growing up, the pain would lurk its ugly head. The worst it ever got was when I was alone in the dark. I felt so much fear growing up. This is something I had to overcome and learn from.

Life is so interesting. It makes us walk through different paths of choices. We are unable to see the destruction and pain we are about to go through. These challenges mold us and makes us the people we are today. There are two experiences that I would like to share with you today. The first is my divorce and the second is the death of my sister. These events steered me into a life of addiction, and I hope my message can help change at least one life. I know that I felt exhausted from the life of chasing -- chasing for a cure that would never appear.

My divorce was not something simple. It ate at me every day. I got there through a series of issues that happened. I was fired from my job. I had to sell my home that I bought for my now ex-wife and my unborn son. I sat and cried in my son's room alone because I felt like a failure. During all of this, I was hiding my addiction until I couldn't handle it anymore. My wife found out and kicked me out of our apartment. I felt so angry, I felt like she threw me out like trash. I was acting like a child, instead of dealing with it like I should have. I was so hard on myself. I felt like I was losing control, but the lesson to this is to allow things to go. I needed to surrender to this. I also learned that I needed to ask for help instead of hiding from the issues. This takes me to my next lesson -- when my sister passed.

When my sister passed away, it was seven days of hell. She passed due to multiple abscesses, one on each arm and one in her stomach. I stayed up for seven days changing her bedding because she would either defecate or urinate on herself. I cleaned her and watched her as she tried to sleep but couldn't because of the pain. I tried to plead with her to let me call 911 because at the time, I had no idea what was happening. She would say, "No, I want to wait for mom to come home." Our mother was away on vacation visiting family out of the country and would return in seven days. I can still hear her cries of agony, day after day. She made me promise that I wouldn't call 911 until our mother returned. So, I kept that promise and kept her secret. I never knew what an abscess was and how serious it would become. After the 7 days were up, our mother returned home. The next morning, we called 911. My mother was frantic and didn't know what to do. Even in agony my sister lied to the EMTs; she said nothing about her use. My sister wanted our mother to not find out her secret. I couldn't stay quiet any longer, I told the EMTs everything, but it was too late. My sister passed away after two days. The doctors tried to take the contaminated blood out of her system, but nothing they did helped. It was just too late.

Prior to all of this, I would plead with my family to help my sister. They just did not want to believe that there was a problem. During her funeral, everyone was upset and saying they could have done this or that. I was so disgusted with my family that I didn't attend. I wanted to remember my sister by the good times and not the last seven days of her life. I felt so much guilt over what had happened. I had to deal with the pain. I had to let go of the resentment, anger, fear, sadness, judgement, secrets, hurt, blame, and guilt. I had to put my faith in something more. I had to put my faith in a higher power. So, I had to make some changes in my life. I started making commitments.

Making a commitment every day to stay sober requires faith. If I make the necessary changes, things will get better. I need to accept that some choices and things are out of my control, and I need to be okay with that. I will trust myself in making the changes that are needed and have pride in myself. My selfishness will be in my sobriety and not in negative actions towards people. Faith can be anything I desire it to be. 

Cedar House has taught me to take responsibility in myself, my actions, my behavior and, most importantly, in my addiction. Throughout this journey, I have learned to love myself again, to work on my character defects, and to gain so many new brothers in sobriety. In life, so many people make mistakes, and you can choose to get up and make the necessary changes or get beat down. And I was beat down over and over again. I walked into rehab beaten, bruised, and broken. It was challenging, but over time the bruises healed and the bones that were broken started to heal as well. 

I am grateful to overcome the mountain of rehabilitation. I didn't do this by myself. It took a brotherhood of men who were broken and beaten, too. We all faced our fears in our own time. It also took the patience and care of our counselors. They gave us guidance and advice that we desperately needed. They were the lighthouse to our battered ships. Without them we wouldn't know which way to steer. To my brothers in the war for sobriety, I say, my love goes out to you, to the ones who are healing, and to the ones who still need help. To the staff of Cedar House, no amount of gratitude will express how much I am thankful for. You revived my broken soul. 

I will end with one final thing to my brothers, you're not alone.
Guided By the Lighthouse
By 7000873882 March 13, 2026
In 2009, everything changed for Preston with a single accident. What began with prescription pain medication after a dirt bike injury slowly spiraled into a heroin addiction that would take hold of his life for years. But one decision made just days before Christmas would change everything. The Road to Addiction After a dirt bike accident in 2009 left him injured, doctors prescribed pain pills to manage the pain. At first, it seemed harmless, but like many people during the opioid crisis, the prescription slowly turned into dependence. By 2012, when prescription pills became harder to get, someone at work offered a cheaper alternative. “They said, ‘I can get you something better and cheaper,’” he remembers. “You try it first, and then they tell you it’s heroin. I was like, ‘I don’t do heroin.’ And they said, ‘Yeah… you do now.’” From 2012 to 2015 heroin addiction took hold of his life. The people around him were using too, and the lifestyle became normal. Eventually everything began to fall apart. “I remember looking in a drawer one day and realizing there was nothing left—just pencils and random stuff. Nothing of value. That’s when it really hit me how empty my life had become.” A Christmas Turning Point In December 2015, just days before Christmas, he finally reached a breaking point. “I told my mom I was fed up. I said, ‘Let’s figure this out. I need help.’” He found Cedar House Life Change Center and entered detox on December 16, 2015. Originally, he planned to stay only the required seven days. But recovery rarely begins smoothly. One night during detox he woke up and asked to use the phone. “I called everyone in my family and told them I hated them because they wouldn’t come pick me up. I didn’t want to be stuck there for Christmas.” The next morning his counselor called him into her office. What she told him that day stayed with him. “If you stay,” she told him, “You’ll miss this one Christmas, but you won’t have to miss all the other Christmases.” Lessons That Stuck His counselor shared another lesson he still carries today. She explained that life is like a backpack. If you throw a bunch of heavy stones into it all at once, you won’t be able to walk. Just like if you try to tackle all of life’s problems at once, you won’t get very far. But if you add just a few metaphorical stones each day and deal with just the issues you can handle, you can keep moving forward and progressing in life. Those simple ideas – taking life one day at a time and not carrying more than you can handle – became powerful tools in his recovery. Although he had entered Cedar House only for detox, his counselor secured three additional days in residential treatment across the hall. At the time he admits he still planned to use again when he left. But during those extra days, something shifted. At a recovery panel he heard a man speak about rebuilding trust with his mother after years of addiction. Preston could relate to that experience of taking advantage of his mom. Hearing him talk about earning her trust back made him realize that was possible for him, too. Rebuilding a Life He left Cedar House the day after Christmas, and his mom picked him up. On the drive home they stopped for food and talked about what came next. With guidance from his counselor, he made a list of everything addiction had taken away from him. Then he began slowly taking those things back. He started spending time with family again, accepting invitations, going to the river, and rebuilding relationships that had been strained by addiction. “You can’t lie to the mirror,” he says. “At the end of the day, you have to do this for yourself.” There were still challenges ahead – court dates, fines, and apologies to make. At one point a judge even rejected a handwritten apology letter he had written, crumpling it up in front of him and telling him it needed to be more sincere. So, he wrote it again. A Future Restored Recovery opened doors he never imagined. He began working in the oil fields in Montana, working one week on and one week off. During that time, he met the woman who would become his wife, and together they built a family with five children. He later returned to California, regained custody of his two older children, and continued rebuilding his life. Six years after leaving Cedar House, he returned to work with Teamsters Local 166 as an inspector on a military base. Today he is proud of the life he has rebuilt and grateful for the second chance he was given. “If I could help even one more person, it would be worth it,” he says. “I wouldn’t wish that life on my worst enemy.” Looking back, he believes the challenges he faced helped shape the person he is today. “Without those struggles, I wouldn’t be who I am now.”
By 7000873882 February 12, 2026
There is nothing quite as powerful as a mother’s love. From the moment her son was born, Sereeta knew she would do everything she could to protect him. She had already experienced the heartbreak of losing her children once, and she was determined never to feel that pain again. Sereeta’s struggle with addiction began at the age of 19. She entered treatment and remained sober for six years, building a life she was proud of. But everything changed when she became a victim of domestic violence. The abuse eventually led to her losing custody of her five children -- a loss that shattered her world and led to relapse. “I could not get away from him. He would try to control me.” Desperate to escape the violence, Sereeta left and began living on the streets. She slept near a shopping center, searching for safety and resources wherever she could find them. One day, at a charity donations center, a woman noticed her and offered help. That connection led Sereeta to Cedar House, where she sought treatment for methamphetamine and marijuana addiction, and where her life began to change. “I knew I wanted a change but didn’t know how.” Years of trauma and loss had taken a toll. Sereeta struggled with anger and didn’t yet know how to process the pain she carried. What surprised her most was the compassion she encountered at Cedar House. Staff members didn’t give up on her. They believed in her, even when she struggled to believe in herself. “I saw that different people had hope in me.” Just one week after arriving at Cedar House, Sereeta was hospitalized. Over the next three weeks, she remained in close contact with staff, calling regularly for reassurance. “I didn’t want to lose my son. I didn’t want to feel that pain again.” After an eight-hour surgery and a blood transfusion, Sereeta gave birth to a healthy baby boy. But the next day, a police officer and social worker arrived at her hospital room with the devastating news that she would not be taking her baby home. Four days later, Sereeta returned to Cedar House with 34 surgical staples, deep emotional wounds, and a renewed determination. “That’s when I believe my journey started. I was fighting for that little boy. I never fought so hard for anything in my life.” The first month was difficult. Sereeta continued to wrestle with anger, grief, and the trauma of her past. “The first month was hard. It was a battle for me.” Over six months at Cedar House, Sereeta did the work. She achieved sobriety, learned healthy ways to manage her anger, and began rebuilding her faith. “I didn’t realize God had something else in store for me. I just had to trust in the process.” After completing treatment, Sereeta transitioned into other supportive housing. Slowly, she began having overnight visits with her son. On August 22, those visits became extended stays. On September 5, she was granted full custody of her baby boy. Today, Sereeta is a full-time Civic Engagement Specialist for a charitable foundation. She lives in her own apartment with her son and spends every other weekend with all of her children. “I have established leadership skills, budgeting skills, and learned how to be a productive member of society as a mother.” Looking back, Sereeta speaks of the “true, honest support” she found at Cedar House. The love and care she received from staff, and even something as simple as an Acceptance Prayer, carried her through moments when she felt overwhelmed. “If it wasn’t for Cedar House, I would still be traumatized by the domestic violence. The staff members showed me love like I’ve never been shown before.” Sereeta’s story is one of resilience, healing, and the power of believing in someone until they can believe in themselves. It is a testament to what is possible when compassion meets commitment, and when a mother is given the support she needs to fight for her future and her family.
alcohol rehabilitation
January 19, 2026
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